I have found myself saying that a lot to people recently when they ask me how we are doing. Before Son #2 was born, I remember telling people how two children are really easier than one because they play together, or how next semester wasn't going to be so bad because I had arranged my classes and work in this or that way. When the baby was born, I don't think it really hit me for the first month. I just ran on adrenaline. But little by little, the sleep deprivation started to take its toll. I started getting more cranky with my husband, I couldn't think straight...
I had to start school and go back to work as a grad assistant when Son #2 was only 6 weeks, which was earlier than with Son #1. I actually started at 10 hours a week instead of the normal 20, I still haven't started one of my classes, and the one I am taking is relatively easy. And still I come home and complain, "This is so much harder than I thought it would be!"
When the Son #2 first arrived, I remember someone asked how we were doing, and I responded, "There isn't enough time, energy, resources..." or something like that. I really felt convicted by God after I said that, because one thing He specifically spoke to me about the new year of 2012 is that "there is enough." There is always enough. Maybe not as much as as I thought there would be, or as much as I want, but there is always enough for what I need. That is a hard concept for a rich, fat, white North American to grasp (meaning myself here, people). I mean, it's Biblical... when Paul asked God to remove the "thorn in his flesh" whatever that was, God responded by saying, "My grace is sufficient for you." Meaning, "No, I won't remove it, but I will give you my strength, my provision, my annointing to get you through."
The children are not "thorns in our flesh" or our "cross to bear" in a sense. We don't want God to remove them, anyway, although sometimes I feel a little bit on the edge at 3 a.m. In another sense, they are the very thing (or people, rather) that is helping us to die to ourselves daily, if we will allow God to do that in us and we don't resist the process completely. We said "yes" to God about marriage. We said "yes" to God about children, even so close in age. We knowingly chose to follow God and take what He has to offer us. We went in with our eyes open, so to speak. But even so, it's so much harder than I though it would be.
I said to my husband the other night that I have never had a semester (because I measure my life in semesters, Christmas break and summer break) where I haven't had to cry out to God for help. I don't just mean a little help. I mean, "God, if you don't actually do it through me, it's not going to happen." And every semester He does it. He works miracles, He works through me, He gives me strength, wisdom and strategies to finish. Every time. He always finishes what He starts. And He has started a good thing in us. We are so blessed, we have more than we need, and eventually it will get easier. Or so I keep telling myself.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Cloth Diapers
We use cloth diapers. Not the old-fashioned kind, but the post-disposable diaper kind. Some of the new kinds are designed specifically so people (i.e. daycare workers, etc.) who are hesitant to do the dirty work of cloth diapers might not be so... hesitant. Anyway, we are not afraid to get our hands dirty. We really wanted to save money and felt it was also better stewardship of the environment. But I should say, when the going gets tough, it is the money that is the stronger argument. I hate to say it, but that's the truth.
People ask me what kind I prefer, and after a year and a half I have a pretty standard answer:
We use Flip or Econobum covers with Flip stay-dry (microfiber) inserts. For more absorbency, we add a microfiber double or a hemp double (smaller inserts). We do have a few BumGenius 4.0s with snaps. We don't like the velcro (hook and loop) because it wears out faster, although it is easier to get on a squirmy baby. I have newborn cloth diapers, but I almost don't think they are worth it considering the baby wears them for such a short period of time. That would be where the environmental argument comes in...
In previous decades... okay, 30-40 years ago, people used cloth diapers, babies were potty-trained at 18 months, and the landfills looked a lot smaller than they do now. When disposable diapers came along, they became a status symbol. Now, we choose cloth diapers because we can't afford disposable diapers, and yet families with less resources buy brand-name diapers when they can't afford food. I recently read a blog about issues of justice related to diapers. I never thought about diapers in this light, having never had to choose between food and diapers. It made me realize that cloth diapers have now become a status symbol, though, because it implies that you own a washer and dryer.
This is another issue that is upside down, so to speak. Cloth diapering should be the accessible for people who don't have many resources. We fall into that category, but we are still privileged. We have friends and family who bought us diapers and we own a good washer and dryer. We don't have to work 4 jobs to make ends meet, so we have time to wash diapers on top of that.
I don't know the solution to this issue, but I think it falls in the category of urban restoration, or societal restoration, which is probably a better way to look at it, since these issues are not restricted to people who live in cities. However, since my brain is busy with changing poopy diapers, washing them, and feeding the baby who makes the poopy diapers, I can't get any more analytical than that at the moment.
People ask me what kind I prefer, and after a year and a half I have a pretty standard answer:
We use Flip or Econobum covers with Flip stay-dry (microfiber) inserts. For more absorbency, we add a microfiber double or a hemp double (smaller inserts). We do have a few BumGenius 4.0s with snaps. We don't like the velcro (hook and loop) because it wears out faster, although it is easier to get on a squirmy baby. I have newborn cloth diapers, but I almost don't think they are worth it considering the baby wears them for such a short period of time. That would be where the environmental argument comes in...
In previous decades... okay, 30-40 years ago, people used cloth diapers, babies were potty-trained at 18 months, and the landfills looked a lot smaller than they do now. When disposable diapers came along, they became a status symbol. Now, we choose cloth diapers because we can't afford disposable diapers, and yet families with less resources buy brand-name diapers when they can't afford food. I recently read a blog about issues of justice related to diapers. I never thought about diapers in this light, having never had to choose between food and diapers. It made me realize that cloth diapers have now become a status symbol, though, because it implies that you own a washer and dryer.
This is another issue that is upside down, so to speak. Cloth diapering should be the accessible for people who don't have many resources. We fall into that category, but we are still privileged. We have friends and family who bought us diapers and we own a good washer and dryer. We don't have to work 4 jobs to make ends meet, so we have time to wash diapers on top of that.
I don't know the solution to this issue, but I think it falls in the category of urban restoration, or societal restoration, which is probably a better way to look at it, since these issues are not restricted to people who live in cities. However, since my brain is busy with changing poopy diapers, washing them, and feeding the baby who makes the poopy diapers, I can't get any more analytical than that at the moment.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Best Laid Plans
I haven't posted in quite a while, and here is possibly why...
In December, we had a new baby, which means I was pregnant for at least 9 mos. prior to that, which means I was very tired. I was also in school for most of that time. Well, actually that is a new development also.
I was working full-time, but I quit that job right around the time I came down with mono for the third time in my life... and then found out I was also pregnant again. I decided for my health that I needed a change. I applied for a grad assistantship and now I am seriously pursuing a Ph.D. program in Education (as opposed to halfheartedly pursuing it). Still, that did not leave time for blogging.
Also, when I quit my job, I stopped getting pay checks. Weird. But right around that time, I decided that I should apply for WIC since our income would be significantly decreased. At the same time, I felt I could not justify taking help from the government while we also spent $225 a month for about the equivalent of 8 very fresh and locally grown meals from Fair Shares. So we dropped our share. I was sad, to be honest, but realized how much of a luxury that type of food is... It is sustainable in the way it is produced, but not in its accessibility to the masses.
We finally have recycling bins close to us. First, they appeared on side streets close to us, and lo and behold, one day a recycling bin appeared in the alley behind our house, which means we can empty the bins any time we want! And contrary to my former sarcastic remark that recycling is only for rich people, I now know that recycling is also a luxury that is not always accessible to the masses. But it should be available to everyone. So should fresh, good food. But it has to be at a good price, as well.
Our garden was a constant learning experience this past year. Actually, the weather was against everyone. It was so hot that even professional farmers had trouble... and then stayed warm so we had lettuce in November and a few tomatoes to boot.
It's probably about time to start seedlings in the basement for next year already... my husband will probably be the one to do it, though. He is the executioner around here. I think up the schemes and he executes them. It works for us. I have more hopes set on our garden this year, though, since that will possibly be a major source of fresh veggies for us without our Fair Shares share. I might have to get my hands dirty...
The chickens lost one of their companions last year. She was fine in the morning, and by evening she was dead. I cried. I don't know if I can really put them in a soup now. They are still laying, but not as much as the first year. We may get a few more older chickens in the spring from an uncle who is getting a whole new flock. Then we will have more eggs than we know what to do with since we also get eggs with WIC.
And finally, I have not made granola for a few months, even though I had stocked up on oats and coconut. First, we get cereal with WIC. The price of commercial cereal was part of the reason I made granola. Secondly, I have been pregnant and now just tired. So that's what happened. Maybe I will start up again.
God is good. There is provision for our family in various ways. And I feel more in touch with my neighbors than before. Well, my neighborhood, I should say, since we don't have proper neighbors--the houses next to us are abandoned and empty, and the closest inhabited house has a transitory population. The children that live there haven't been by since it has been cold, but maybe they will be back when the weather is warmer to ask for eggs and pick peppers and tomatoes that aren't quite ripe. ;o)
In December, we had a new baby, which means I was pregnant for at least 9 mos. prior to that, which means I was very tired. I was also in school for most of that time. Well, actually that is a new development also.
I was working full-time, but I quit that job right around the time I came down with mono for the third time in my life... and then found out I was also pregnant again. I decided for my health that I needed a change. I applied for a grad assistantship and now I am seriously pursuing a Ph.D. program in Education (as opposed to halfheartedly pursuing it). Still, that did not leave time for blogging.
Also, when I quit my job, I stopped getting pay checks. Weird. But right around that time, I decided that I should apply for WIC since our income would be significantly decreased. At the same time, I felt I could not justify taking help from the government while we also spent $225 a month for about the equivalent of 8 very fresh and locally grown meals from Fair Shares. So we dropped our share. I was sad, to be honest, but realized how much of a luxury that type of food is... It is sustainable in the way it is produced, but not in its accessibility to the masses.
We finally have recycling bins close to us. First, they appeared on side streets close to us, and lo and behold, one day a recycling bin appeared in the alley behind our house, which means we can empty the bins any time we want! And contrary to my former sarcastic remark that recycling is only for rich people, I now know that recycling is also a luxury that is not always accessible to the masses. But it should be available to everyone. So should fresh, good food. But it has to be at a good price, as well.
Our garden was a constant learning experience this past year. Actually, the weather was against everyone. It was so hot that even professional farmers had trouble... and then stayed warm so we had lettuce in November and a few tomatoes to boot.
It's probably about time to start seedlings in the basement for next year already... my husband will probably be the one to do it, though. He is the executioner around here. I think up the schemes and he executes them. It works for us. I have more hopes set on our garden this year, though, since that will possibly be a major source of fresh veggies for us without our Fair Shares share. I might have to get my hands dirty...
The chickens lost one of their companions last year. She was fine in the morning, and by evening she was dead. I cried. I don't know if I can really put them in a soup now. They are still laying, but not as much as the first year. We may get a few more older chickens in the spring from an uncle who is getting a whole new flock. Then we will have more eggs than we know what to do with since we also get eggs with WIC.
And finally, I have not made granola for a few months, even though I had stocked up on oats and coconut. First, we get cereal with WIC. The price of commercial cereal was part of the reason I made granola. Secondly, I have been pregnant and now just tired. So that's what happened. Maybe I will start up again.
God is good. There is provision for our family in various ways. And I feel more in touch with my neighbors than before. Well, my neighborhood, I should say, since we don't have proper neighbors--the houses next to us are abandoned and empty, and the closest inhabited house has a transitory population. The children that live there haven't been by since it has been cold, but maybe they will be back when the weather is warmer to ask for eggs and pick peppers and tomatoes that aren't quite ripe. ;o)
 |
| Baby #2 |
Beans, milk and tuna
If you have ever been on WIC, enough said... if you haven't, then I will explain. WIC is a wonderful government program (for you conservatives out there--no that is not an oxymoron) that benefits women with infants and children, hence, the acronym "WIC". On WIC, families who qualify (i.e. make less than a certain amount per month based on the number of people in the home) get checks every month that can be redeemed for more milk than most people can drink, more beans than most people eat, and tuna. Maybe some people eat that much tuna. I don't know.
There are other things that you get with the checks, like bread and rice, but nothing like the amounts of the aforementioned items. So we get creative.
Before we were on WIC, we already had a commitment to eat at least one meal a week of legumes (beans or lentils). Partly this was to save money, partly to be healthy, and partly to show solidarity for the majority of the world that lives on the equivalent of rice and beans... three meals a day, seven days a week. Our diet has so much variety as middle class Americans, it is hard for us to imagine how most of the people on the earth actually live day to day.
Beans--these are actually the hardest to work with because I think our culture has something of an aversion to the food. I'm not sure if it is what it does to your digestive system with all that extra fiber (beans, beans, the magical fruit...), or if it is that they are not all that tasty without creativity and spices (another thing to which white Americans seem to have an aversion), or if it is that they send a message about status (i.e. they are cheap). In any case, we have had a challenge making ourselves eat beans for several meals a week. It mostly didn't happen towards the end of the pregnancy and after the newest baby was born, since it takes so much creativity and planning. Remember, the beans in the Taco Bell burrito don't count--must use the beans on our shelf.
Now a word about protein: as it turns out, meat is not actually a necessary staple in a meal that includes a legume, a starch (rice, bread, potatoes) and a dairy product (cheese, yogurt, milk). This is something that Indians (dot, not feather) have down pat with their curry meals featuring heavily spiced legumes, rice and some kind of yogurt. Which leads me to spices...
We buy curry in large containers at Jay's for about $4. We can thank Bizzy for that revelation, and that is how we eat most of our legumes. Another large quantity gets cooked with Mexican-type spices. We make some soups, my husband figured out how to make falafel with chick peas... and you would be amazed at how much beans we still haven't used. They are our emergency stock pile food. Really. We buy canned so in an emergency, we don't have to worry about water to cook them in. Enough about beans.
Milk--this has been more fun than beans, for me anyway. My husband doesn't like milk or yogurt, really, but we do love cheese. My oldest son went on milk strike for a while, so we have had more than we can drink. For a while, I have made yogurt using a $13 yogurt maker (keeps the yogurt at the right temperature for 8-10 hours... nothing high tech). In fact, it's the only culinary activity I've kept up since I was pregnant and on WIC. Granola and bread making have been sadly neglected. Anyway, as I said yogurt is good with curry, but isn't everyone's favorite. And then there was cheese...
One day, while bringing the milk to boil for yogurt, there was cheese. Okay, curds and whey. Which meant the milk had turned sour, thereby starting the cheese making process. So I just went ahead and finished it. I salted it, strained the curds, and pressed most of the whey out and voila! Queso fresco. My husband is, as we speak, experimenting with different ways to make cheese, and making whey bread (using the whey instead of water). So maybe bread making is back in. ;o)
Tuna--you either love or you hate it. And mostly you don't get creative with it. So that's as much type space as tuna gets.
All in all, we are grateful for the food provided by WIC (ultimately provided by the good taxpayers... don't worry, we are thankful for you, too). I have to say, I'm not sure who makes the decisions over there in Washington or what that process is, but I would love to be a fly on the wall to hear the story of all those beans, milk and tuna.
There are other things that you get with the checks, like bread and rice, but nothing like the amounts of the aforementioned items. So we get creative.
Before we were on WIC, we already had a commitment to eat at least one meal a week of legumes (beans or lentils). Partly this was to save money, partly to be healthy, and partly to show solidarity for the majority of the world that lives on the equivalent of rice and beans... three meals a day, seven days a week. Our diet has so much variety as middle class Americans, it is hard for us to imagine how most of the people on the earth actually live day to day.
Beans--these are actually the hardest to work with because I think our culture has something of an aversion to the food. I'm not sure if it is what it does to your digestive system with all that extra fiber (beans, beans, the magical fruit...), or if it is that they are not all that tasty without creativity and spices (another thing to which white Americans seem to have an aversion), or if it is that they send a message about status (i.e. they are cheap). In any case, we have had a challenge making ourselves eat beans for several meals a week. It mostly didn't happen towards the end of the pregnancy and after the newest baby was born, since it takes so much creativity and planning. Remember, the beans in the Taco Bell burrito don't count--must use the beans on our shelf.
Now a word about protein: as it turns out, meat is not actually a necessary staple in a meal that includes a legume, a starch (rice, bread, potatoes) and a dairy product (cheese, yogurt, milk). This is something that Indians (dot, not feather) have down pat with their curry meals featuring heavily spiced legumes, rice and some kind of yogurt. Which leads me to spices...
We buy curry in large containers at Jay's for about $4. We can thank Bizzy for that revelation, and that is how we eat most of our legumes. Another large quantity gets cooked with Mexican-type spices. We make some soups, my husband figured out how to make falafel with chick peas... and you would be amazed at how much beans we still haven't used. They are our emergency stock pile food. Really. We buy canned so in an emergency, we don't have to worry about water to cook them in. Enough about beans.
Milk--this has been more fun than beans, for me anyway. My husband doesn't like milk or yogurt, really, but we do love cheese. My oldest son went on milk strike for a while, so we have had more than we can drink. For a while, I have made yogurt using a $13 yogurt maker (keeps the yogurt at the right temperature for 8-10 hours... nothing high tech). In fact, it's the only culinary activity I've kept up since I was pregnant and on WIC. Granola and bread making have been sadly neglected. Anyway, as I said yogurt is good with curry, but isn't everyone's favorite. And then there was cheese...
One day, while bringing the milk to boil for yogurt, there was cheese. Okay, curds and whey. Which meant the milk had turned sour, thereby starting the cheese making process. So I just went ahead and finished it. I salted it, strained the curds, and pressed most of the whey out and voila! Queso fresco. My husband is, as we speak, experimenting with different ways to make cheese, and making whey bread (using the whey instead of water). So maybe bread making is back in. ;o)
Tuna--you either love or you hate it. And mostly you don't get creative with it. So that's as much type space as tuna gets.
All in all, we are grateful for the food provided by WIC (ultimately provided by the good taxpayers... don't worry, we are thankful for you, too). I have to say, I'm not sure who makes the decisions over there in Washington or what that process is, but I would love to be a fly on the wall to hear the story of all those beans, milk and tuna.
Monday, June 27, 2011
Recycling
I have a pile of recycling in my basement that I would like to just throw in the trash. I'm tired of it in my way. The thing is, we don't live in a "rich" part of the city, so even though we received shiny brochure in the mail announcing a new initiative in the city to put recycling bins in every alley, we have never seen such a bin. I have sent complaints to the city, but apparently, my house isn't nice enough, because I never heard a reply.
So they are basically assuming that my neighbors and I don't want to recycle. Maybe that's because I don't actually have neighbors on either side. Maybe that's because there isn't even a trash can on our sidewalk so there is trash everywhere, and of course, people who don't throw trash in the trash can are not going to recycle. Or maybe it's the same reason the Metrolink station on Grand has been a health hazard, while Metrolink stations at Forsyth have colored lights and seat warmers. Maybe it's the same reason the main streets get repaved while some of our side streets are still cobblestone. And I wonder if the crack house on the street with cobblestones would be there if the street were paved, or if the street would get paved if there were no crack house. But that might be off topic. Or it might not be.
In any case, I did not throw away the recycling. Why? Am I that hippy tree-hugger? Call me what you like, but I actually have faith that my recycled stuff cuts down on new plastics being made, new waste sitting in the landfill that keeps growing, etc. Maybe my faith is blind and they really just throw everything away. I hope not. But then, I am one of those people who has the luxury to think about things like recycling. Anyway, it would seem that the city only believes that rich people want to recycle.
So they are basically assuming that my neighbors and I don't want to recycle. Maybe that's because I don't actually have neighbors on either side. Maybe that's because there isn't even a trash can on our sidewalk so there is trash everywhere, and of course, people who don't throw trash in the trash can are not going to recycle. Or maybe it's the same reason the Metrolink station on Grand has been a health hazard, while Metrolink stations at Forsyth have colored lights and seat warmers. Maybe it's the same reason the main streets get repaved while some of our side streets are still cobblestone. And I wonder if the crack house on the street with cobblestones would be there if the street were paved, or if the street would get paved if there were no crack house. But that might be off topic. Or it might not be.
In any case, I did not throw away the recycling. Why? Am I that hippy tree-hugger? Call me what you like, but I actually have faith that my recycled stuff cuts down on new plastics being made, new waste sitting in the landfill that keeps growing, etc. Maybe my faith is blind and they really just throw everything away. I hope not. But then, I am one of those people who has the luxury to think about things like recycling. Anyway, it would seem that the city only believes that rich people want to recycle.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
New Mercies
That's what restoration is all about: mercy. And that's what we get, in the natural and in the spiritual. Our garden was in need of mercy, because we had messed it up. So after a little garden lime, a little more compost, and some fish emulsion, plus a good few weeks of cool, rainy weather, our lettuce is finally growing, our tomatoes look like they might become good plants, and the chard is growing. Then comes some hot weather, so the peppers and eggplants will have a shot, too. God is good.
The biggest thing I'm learning in all this is that God is not afraid of mess. I mean, I keep learning this, because I'm messy and God isn't afraid of me again and again. This might only just be a learning process, but that's okay. I hope we get some eggplant, but if we don't, there is always next year.
The biggest thing I'm learning in all this is that God is not afraid of mess. I mean, I keep learning this, because I'm messy and God isn't afraid of me again and again. This might only just be a learning process, but that's okay. I hope we get some eggplant, but if we don't, there is always next year.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)